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Hey folks!.

Okay seriously? I know, I know. I can’t promise when I will blog…I can only promise that I will.

Now, on to the show.

One of my favorite cautionary quotes is “Trust is like a mirror. You can fix it if it’s broken, but you’ll still see the cracks in the reflection.” (That dang on Lady GaGa, lol. This is paraphrased to take out the curse word, but you get the point.) It has gotten me to thinking over the past few months days. Can you actually rebuild trust?

There have been times I’ve forgiven people. A lot of times. But I notice that I still treat them who have recently been in car accidents and hear screeching noises: I tense up. Not physically, but emotionally. If you’ve lied to me, I question what you say. If you’ve let me down, I don’t depend on you. Sure, I’ve gotten past the actual infraction, but I’m not leaving myself open to a future one.

I found this interesting in Carrie more than any of the other girls. She seemed to trust Big implicitly. She went back to him, let’s see…1, 2, 3, 4, …5 times (or so…hmm…6 if you include the movie…more if you include little rendezvous…what the heck is the plural of rendezvous?? It already sounds plural. #englishteacherswag) throughout the course of the series. She seemed like she had forgotten the past at every encounter. However, in SATC: The Movie, she literally went from

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to….

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…within a 24 hour period. Now granted, you jilt me…you better HOPE all I have at my disposal are flowers. BUT…what got me was her statement: “I knew you would do this to me! I knew it!” Seems all wasn’t forgotten. His past mistakes/decisions/let downs came rushing back in that statement. In that statement, there wasn’t surprise. There was confirmation.

Miranda and Steve met on the Brooklyn Bridge to show that trust would be restored………………..but they never quite returned to that storyline at all in the second movie to explore. I wonder if she would’ve ever done a phone blow-up on a night when it seemed he was taking too long to come home from the bar after that.

I want to say that I can refill trust…but at most, I think I have a 90% trust refund. That capacity diminishes by double the previous with every infraction. And, I’m pretty forgiving. I get mad at myself when I feel like I’ve gotten “un-angry” too quickly. But, that forgetting is a different ball game. It’s like even when I think I can, my head gives my heart a side-eye like, “Really? Really dude?”

So what say you? Can trust be repaired completely? Or does the party seeking restoration of trust have to live with the diminished capacity? Or…is time the necessary factor, but the length of time is indeterminable? What say you?

Love,

–V

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Happy New Year (24 days in)!

I sincerely hope that your 2011 was made of awesome, chocolate chips, and blessings. 🙂

It’s taken me awhile to write because I was so focused on what I wouldn’t write about. Life has been a bit rough, and I am uncomfortable with writing about it in it’s rawness. I know it will make an awesome testimony at some point in some way, but right now……. :\

However, I decided that I would write about what I will write about. All of my favorite moments in Sex and the City have to do with the girls being there for each other in rough times…Miranda forcing everyone to talk about Samantha’s cancer during her wedding reception; Carrie stepping in with Miranda in her mother’s funeral possession; Charlotte’s sitting with Carrie when she read Big’s marriage announcement; Samantha forcing Carrie to eat in Mexico; I could continue.

My 2011 ended in a not so great way. While I won’t get into that, I will discuss my friends. When I tell you that there is no better thing in the world (or as a fashion accessory…yes I’m talking to you, lady who insists on wearing leggings as pants) than friends who are not too afraid to be real, not too hard to be compassionate, not t0o cynical to be optimistic, and not too realistic to be faith full. In all of the aforementioned Sex and the City moments, one that stands out to me most is this one:

Only a friend leaves the house dressed this way.

 

<– You see that? That’s real.

Carrie was going through her own stuff. She’d been unceremoniously jilted. She was embarrassed, sad, and still dealing. But, her friend needed her. Her friend didn’t even state that she needed her…she just knew. And she was ready to throw on a coat, sparkly hat, and boots to brave Manhattan’s winter and subway system to be there for her friend (Sex and the City Movie).

According to Wikipedia, Auld Lang Syne “may be translated into English literally as “old long since”, or more idiomatically, “long long ago”,[4] “days gone by” or “old times”. Consequently “For auld lang syne”, as it appears in the first line of the chorus, is loosely translated as “for (the sake of) old times”. While I can’t control old times, I can celebrate the positives that has come from it.

I have to thank God for the friends He’s given me at the time He’s given them. Only they can affirm you when you feel like breaking down. Only they are willing to stand with you when the rest of the world thinks you’re crazy…even when they think you’re crazy. They’re ready to be on the CNN because someone has harmed you in any way. They’re ready to give snot-nosed (yet cute-faced) prayers to God on your behalf.

Although I don’t believe in stories like “The Notebook”…I do believe in friendships like the girls on Sex and the City. Not necessarily the value systems that they hold, but for the value they see in each other. And no matter what, that crosses all lines. So whether it’s a Louisiana-bred, Kentucky raised chicken judger, a fairly new face who happens to be a jet-setter, a “different than day and night” pair from the heart of the D, someone whose friendship has lasted over a decade, a co-worker who has moved out of that box into other boxes, or the friend you never thought you’d make but has provided consistent God-filled spiritual advice…and she likes shoes like you do…they are important.

Trust me…I’d put on pearls with my pajamas, a sparkly hat, and boots for any of you……..but I ain’t taking MARTA…me and the Camry will ride out though 🙂

I want those friendships for everyone. In 2012, I hope you get it. 🙂

Love,

–V

In honor of Aphrodite’s son’s day of work, I decided to marry this holiday with some of my favorite dates from Sex and the City, so here we go. Here are some ways to spend this day of love with your beaux, your friends, or yourself!

With a Boo

1. Go to an arcade: (Hot Child in the City, Season 3) Carrie and her comic book store owning friend, Wade Adams, spent a hot New York summer evening at an arcade. They had fun, and even used his scooter. “Wooo…look at me! I’m scooting in heels!”

2. Evening of Jazz: (Defining Moments, Season 4) Carrie and Big often went to the Blue Note to just hang as friends. That doesn’t mean it can’t be a romantic encounter for two! And, if push comes to shove, shove comes to a fist fight, and fist fight turns into a bar brawl…just look for cute bass players. Carrie did 😉 Just don’t have a menage a taxi.

3. Home Culinary Skills: (Sex and the City: The Movie) Big often cooked for Carrie…which works. Anyone, or both, can don the apron for the night. Why not look up a recipe online, and make it together.

Out with Friends

1. Attend a major event: (Take Me Out to the Ballgame, Season 2; Sex and the City: The Movie) If you and your friends don’t like the winged-arrowed one, why not head out somewhere with a large crowd? A concert, movie, or play would be a good evening out with the girls. Hey, go to an auction even…find a ring to buy yourself that’s “a little too much” (personality, not price. We are not living outside our means in 2011!)

2. Game Night: (Games People Play, Season 2) Why not round up your girls, or guys, or both, for a night of Phase 10, Taboo, Wii, or whatever. Whether you’re of the spades or bid whist generation, it’ll be fun!

3. Spa Day: (Attack of the 5’10” Woman, Season 3; The Caste System, Season 2) Carrie and her girls spent a day at the spa just hanging out. My friend and I did this once, and had a blast (minus a few sketchy moments, lol). I’m sure you can look online and find spas where you can go and enjoy the saunas, steamrooms, and whirlpools for less money.

Um…shopping goes without saying, right? lol

Solo

1. Go to a book reading: (The Big Journey, Season 5) This could also be done with friends, but either way, enjoy it! Even if you hear about a book reading and don’t want to stay, grab the book and your favorite take out, and go home for a nice relaxing evening.

2. Do something you’ve feared: (The Catch, Season 6) Never in my life would I have tried to be a trapeze artist, but what time like the present when the rest of the world is celebrating love? Fall in love with your adrenaline. If it was me, I’d probably try zip-lining. It looks fun, but terrifying!

3. Take a class to learn a skill. (Was it good for you?, Season 2) Charlotte got her friends to attend a class about improving her, um, horizontal skills, after a guy goes to sleep on her. Yeah…I’m not saying do that, but there are plenty of places where you can go and paint pottery, decorate a space, or learn how to do any number of things. Sometimes, it’s better, because you don’t have to worry about having talkative friends who make you miss hearing the directions!

I hope you are enjoying this day, no matter what. If you don’t have a someone special, I’m sure you have a few…namely great family and friends. And even if you’ve moved by yourself, you have at least someone special with you: yourself. My favorite sex and the city quote has to be from Season 6 Part 2, the final episode.

 

“The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself…and if you can find someone to love the you you love, well…that’s just fabulous.” –Carrie Bradshaw

Do you have any interesting date ideas? I’d like to know. Have an awesome day, wherever you are 🙂

Love,

-V

A few days ago, ShoeDazzle sent out this email:

ShoeDazzleWhich CITY Girl Are You?Our stylists have chosen one of these shoes for you based on your style profile!Carrie - Miranda - Charlotte - Samantha

So I happily went to my shoeroom, and it said I was Charlotte.

*Gasp* Charlotte? Really? I wrinkled my nose up, and exited out of the site. Charlotte seemed so much less exciting in comparison to the other girls (and shoes…except those wedges. No words for those). I was talking to one of my co-workers, who was Samantha, and she said, “Yeah. You’re a Charlotte girl. And, you’re a Charlotte personality.”

Okay, so I had a miniature breakdown when I got home (well, not really, just a train of obsessive thoughts). Am I Charlotte? She seems so drab in comparison to the other girls. Am I drab? Carrie is edgy, Samantha is bold, Miranda is happily sarcastic and pessimistic, and Charlotte seems naively optimistic.

So, I got to thinking about my own self, and who I am. I am focused, with some very key morals. I may ride along with some things, but it is rare that you will get me to do something I think is wrong, or really don’t want to do. She can get influenced (Season 2, “They Shoot Single People, Don’t They?”), and she can lose her happy outlook on life (Season 5, “Unoriginal Sin”); she can be judgemental, and a  prude. She doesn’t always make the best decisions…like that unfortunate Trey experience.

As I thought about it, I am like that. I can be influenced and not always happy. I can be judgemental and a prude, and make horrible decisions. But, like her, I’m also fiercely loyal to my friends. My favorite Charlotte moment was in Sex and the City: The Movie, when Big tries to come after Carrie after standing her up.

"NO!...No!"

She was so angry. She cried. She hurt for her friend, and even “cursed the day he was born.” Each of these women has a role in their circle, and her happiness keeps them all a little grounded and corny. Her moving speech is what got them all to the Hamptons (and got her crabs…but that is another issue) for a vacation because they were moved by her love. Even Carrie had to dedicate her book to her friend, who always believes in love (Unoriginal Sin).

So, if I am Charlotte, I hope I am the type of friend to them that she is. She is not as flashy, or as loud or bold, but she is fly in her sophisticated way, and is one classy lady. So, Charlottes, wherever and whoever you may be, put on your best pearls, and celebrate your uniqueness. I happily join your ranks.

Charlotte, the Class Act

Charlotte, the Class Act

Love,

-V

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