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Yep…I didn’t complete the #31WriteNow challenge…but more on that another day. Today I want to talk about what has been on my mind all day.

One of my favorite (non-hair) blogs is VerySmartBrothas. Last week, one of the site’s contributors shared a 100-word insight on love that he originally posted on another blog.

Please go read it. I’ll wait…..

Read it? Good.

Language aside, it was one of the most poignant and truthful things I’ve ever read. I can completely understand. One of the things I’ve found that came with this all-encompassing happiness from the relationship I’m in wais an ever-present dreading. It feels scary to love someone so much that you become obsessed over how you would deal if they were no longer there. I literally think things such as, “A random drunk driver could change my life and I don’t know how I’d bear it.”

That sucks.

It’s like, I could have an awesome day, a wonderful weekend, and as I’m thinking about it in happiness, this random thought creeps in where if he says he’s about to run to the store for peppermints, I’m dang near hyperventilating. What the what??! This has never happened before. I understood concern for someone taking flights (“Text AS SOON AS you land!!”) or road trips (“Stop texting me and drive!!”), but I’ve never been concerned about Target. Or an outside run. Or lunch (who knows what really leads to cancer these days…). It’s mind-boggling.

What amazes me is that I’ve been in four relationships before now…only two of those being serious…and I’ve never felt this way before. I’d never had this level of concern. Yeah, everyone gets the obligatory “be careful” if they are doing things that requires carefulness, but not the “Please don’t fall getting out of the shower and hit your head on the toilet and black out” type of concern. I imagine that new parents feel the same way.

the-domino-effect-1024In Season 6, “The Domino Effect”, Carrie spends an evening with a visiting Big. He mentions over dinner that he’s in town for heart surgery, and without controlling it, she bursts into tears. It happened again when she visited him in the hospital, and again when she mentioned the reason for his visit to her friends. It was probably the most telling of any relationship she’d ever been in…and she technically wasn’t in one then. She genuinely cared, and the thought that something could happen to him had shaken her to her core. She normally only reserved that type of emotion for the girls. But Big was Big. And he got in. Even though the end of the episode left a lot to be desired on her part, Carrie knew where her feelings were…where they always had been.

I’ll say this, it’s not my hope to start worrying about if caterpillars will mutate and suck the life out of my beloved, but I do know that this is a tell for how much he means to me. Only God can protect him, so I have to let Him do just that. But, one of the best feelings in the world is when I see him walk in the door, and I know he’s safe……………. and with me.

Have you ever experienced this? WHY DIDN’T YOU WARN ME?? How did you handle it? Let me know!

Love,

–V

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ImageYou see this?

It was posted on Instagram by @alex_elle (Alexandra Elle). It spoke to me. Read it.

It is a part of her #anote2self campaign. Her idea is that “we all need reminders” and she invites people to use the hashtag and write their own notes.

This particular one spoke to me because I’ve had a rough year. It is probably been rougher than most realize or understand, that’s for sure. However, on this day…this particular day in February…it’s so easy to focus on what we don’t have or to look to the next level as more important than the one we’re in. So I just wanted to share this #anote2self: You are enough.

It seems like sometimes in life when we keep getting two to the body, and one to the head, we get used to rolling with the punches. What happens is that when we finally stop, we realize that we are bruised. Battered. Beaten. We never give ourselves time to heal between blows. Maybe because we are so used to pressing on. To dusting ourselves off. And when we finally stop…we may not recognize ourselves. We may doubt our abilities. Our gifts. Our value. Our anything. So this reminder is that you are enough.

In “Attack of the 5’10” Woman” (Season 3…my favorite season), Carrie was almost desperate to show Natasha that she was fabulous. When that opportunity didn’t present itself, she felt like less and less. That was because through all of her heartache, she had begun to feel like less and less…but never stopped. My favorite part of that episode is when Charlotte told Carrie in the midst of her obsession: “Listen to you. You don’t have to prove anything. You are stunning… intelligent… and funny.” Carrie’s response was, “Wow! Why can’t you do that for yourself?”

Sometimes we can’t. Sometimes we feel so let down or rejected that it clouds our ability to see value in ourselves. You feel enough pain and you get tired. You believe your worst critique. The value is pushed down deep and possibly covered. But it’s there. And no matter who didn’t see it, who didn’t want it, who can’t stand it…it’s there. And you are enough.

So, just let yourself heal. It’s God’s battle anyway. 🙂

I’m not sure if anyone needed that, but this is #anote2self…so if it isn’t for anyone else, I’ll take it. So no matter how much I’ve been hurt, or feel sad or down, I have to know that I am enough. Even if it’s just because God said so.

Have a Happy Valentine’s Day.

Love,

–V

2012,

We didn’t meet under the best circumstances. Our introduction was awkward, and tainted by deception, betrayal, and embarrassment. I felt like I was a horrible person to deserve some of the things that I had endured by the time I laid eyes on you. I felt like I had control of very little. My life was being held together by a thread…a strong thread, but a thread. I didn’t feel like I had control over anything. And I felt loved, but alone.

I learned one very key lesson from our first glance: Grace. I learned the incredible strength it takes to forgive and push forward once you’ve been wronged. I learned to look past a person’s issues and choices and see the brokenness that caused it. It was important for me to learn that lesson because at some point, I’ll need it from someone else. God allowed me a minor glimpse of what He feels daily when dealing with us… When dealing with me.

As we got to know each other better, I know now that I was hurting. Not from the actual issue present at our meeting, but from every relational issue that had ever been. Some of my fears and self-doubt were surfacing, and it was coated with the tight cap I had placed over my emotions over the last few years. I also realized that the pain from our meeting wasn’t because I had felt deeply, but because I had tried and failed. I was angry that my decision had not worked out, and I had been embarrassed in the process. But it doesn’t change the fact that I sincerely wanted to feel.

I got to know my insecurities as I spent more time with you. I had a glimpse of what I actually wanted, but deep down never thought I could attain. My friendships strengthened. I took a few risks. I used my gifts. I trusted God more. Sometimes I trusted Him less…but at least I now know where those areas are so I can remove my hands. I’d been angry. I started expressing myself in different forms.

I let someone in. Well, correction… someone got in. I was prideful and vulnerable. I was ugly and beautiful. I was hard and soft. I rejected and accepted. I made a friend. A friend who saw my insecurities and didn’t play on them. Someone who affirmed beauty in my ugly places. Someone who didn’t try to make me be… just allowed me to be… and then I was. Helped me see through some of my learned behaviors and make me miss my true personality. I trusted. That’s scary, 2012. You could have warned me that I’d be emoting through the latter part of the year. Could’ve given me some preparation for all the emotions that would come flooding back… but noooooo. I felt stripped and bare no matter how hard I tried to stay covered. And though it was frightening…it was freeing. Just inopportune.

So I’m leaving you with some similar feelings, but they’re a good negative if that makes any sense. I feel my broken places, and now I know they’re there. I won’t board them up. I’ll shine light into them and fix them. I won’t internalize rejection. I may feel lonely, but it’ll pass. And it won’t be my truth forever. I’ll be vulnerable…yet selective. I’ll be cautious…but I’ll love. And I’ll feel pain…but so help me God, it’ll be growing pain. It’ll make me better. Because in the new year, all I want to be is better.

I want that for you too. Whoever you are. So thanks, 2012. It wasn’t always pleasant, but it was necessary.

Love,

–V

So, for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been all in my feelings. I feel some kind of way about that, lol (See what I did there?)

Creatively, that’s been good. A lot of writing…blogs, poetry, song flips, etc… But, for my own brain? It’s in overload. Even when I’m trying to not think about something, I start thinking about why I’m trying not to think about it. That’s a cycle of suckiness. Hmmm… (lol)

So, this is where my thoughts went today: Things I miss about being in a good relationship (or at least a relationship when it was good). My past relationships had some good parts. My future ones will too. Some of these things I’ve never experienced, but I hope I will. I guess some of these are pre-missings. And these won’t be duty-based things, like someone to take out the trash. Just those little together things…

1. Tailor-made personal touches. One of my exes, when we were about to leave each other, he would pick my hand up, kiss the palm, and then take my finger tips and put them between his lips like you would if you were blotting lipstick. (Does this make sense?) It made me giggle. He didn’t do it as often near the end of our relationship, and I noticed. It was personal, at least to me, like that scene in FaceOff where John Travolta’s family all had a sign of affection that they did to each other all the time.

2. Movie Day. Some of the best days I can remember with anyone I’d ever dated were those impromptu days when you just ended up watching movies for a majority of the day. This was especially interesting if the other party had never seen the movie. Because of the type of movies I like, guys normally haven’t seen them, or have seen them and like them. So we’re either cracking up, or discussing. My best movie days normally had my legs across the lap of the guy. Not too close, not too far away (and if I fall asleep and he has to pee…he’s not held prisoner, nor am I awakened, lol. It’s a really good relationship if he comes back and puts them back across his lap.)

3. Dissecting Music. Generally, anyone I’ve been involved with loved music in one respect or another, so I remember long car trips listening to a series of Jay-Z or OutKast albums. And, even more recently, having conversations about harmonies and vocal qualities. I bond over things like that. It was really good if he liked/likes to hear me sing (because I’m always singing… Every song has a soprano part around me, lol.)

4. Neck Kisses and Good Hugs. I’ll keep all the more physical examples in one. There isn’t much explanation needed for this. I’ve always liked those, lol. Neck kisses, especially from behind (you know, like when you’re cooking or something) make me smile the biggest, shyest smile. Good hugs make me happy for the rest of the day.

5. Inside Jokes. Man…Honestly, I probably miss this more than anything. I don’t think I’ve had an inside joke with anyone I was actually dating in forever. I may have had times where I was making fun of them or being sarcastic based on something only the two of us know, but that’s not the same. I mean, to see something, it remind us of a private moment, and we laugh.

6. Hearing “My Girl”. *deep sigh* moving on…

7. Finding Cards to Give/Hide/Etc. I LOVE cards. I like giving them and getting the reaction, and receiving them and reading them over and over (Yep, I’m a re-reader, lol). I remember once, I woke up at 4am and snuck out the house to someone’s car to put a card on their windshield before he got up for work. I also write in the cards too…as if the message in it wasn’t enough. Maybe that makes me sappy… Whatever. I was at one point. I wonder will I be again?

8. Taking impromptu pictures. Silly. Looking in love. Weird. All of them.

9. Calling/texting to tell random information. I remember texting an ex once to tell him that Sonic had chicken sandwiches on sale. Um…WHY are they on SALE? Why are you trying to get rid of them? I don’t want that. Sonic is trying to kill me. (That was the general strand of the text…lots of laughs and chiming in on my conspiracy theory.)

10. Saying “I love you” when leaving each others presence. I’m not overly-emotional, but I am sentimental. Maybe that’s where this whole list comes from.

One thing I always found interesting in the dynamic of Big and Carrie’s relationship is that she there were things she was comfortable doing with him that she was never comfortable doing with everyone else. She never laughed with Petrovsky. She changed herself for Aidan. She watched her words around Berger. I always liked how she just liked being with Big, whether they were in or out. He called her Kid. They dissected people.

Anyway…hopefully, I’ll be out of my feelings soon. I’m a G, and I’m one Amerie/Teedra Moses/Vivian Green/Musiq/Erykah Badu song away from being a punk. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

What are your favorite random things you do in your relationship? Or, if you’re not in one, what things are you looking forward to doing again?

Love,

V 🙂

P.S. In case you want to hear the kinds of songs stuck in my head…here’s a perfect example:

 

 

 

Whenever I go to the grocery store, it is almost a definite that someone will stop me about my hair. They would say some variation of, “Oh my gosh! I love your hair. What do you do to it? What products do you use? I’m natural, but I’m not sure what I need to do.” I share my hair regimen, and I can see the looks on their faces change from “Oh wow” to “Nuh unh.” 4/5 of the time, I hear this phrase:

“Oh wow. Yeah…that’s too much work for me.”

I normally shrug and say, “Well, it works for me.” It has happened so much that I don’t pay it too much attention. It always reminds me of something I saw on a Kevin Hart behind the scenes video. He and his friends say this as a sort of call and response thing: “Everybody wanna be famous…don’t nobody wanna put the work in.” I would chuckle to myself, and keep it moving.

Then, as I was in the shower, hair twisted, shampooing (only my scalp) section by section, drenching with conditioner, finger detangling, and thinking of the black tea rinse I wanted to do, something occurred to me: The same is true of relationships. Everyone wants their Mr. Big, but nobody wants to have to beat him with flowers. For any individual, how much work is too much?

Sometimes, the work for some is at the beginning with appearance. He doesn’t look like you want him too. He’s too _______. If Charlotte had felt that way, she never would have been with Harry, who is arguably (though not really) the best husband on the series. Sometimes, the work is in the middle. Personality differences, disagreements, and/or compromises. The entire Steve and Miranda relationship is based on that premise. Sometimes she did the work; sometimes it was him; either way, it got done. If the work is at the end, like Samantha and Smith, you’re giving the old college try to make sure you’ve exhausted all possibilities before calling it out. But what if your work is like Carrie and Big…all throughout? Is she just stupid for not leaving sooner? Or did her perseverance finally award her the prize?

On VerySmartBrothas.com, there was a post about why women are overly loyal.My friends and I had a conversation about it, and one said, “Most women don’t give up easily…but we need not to if we are going to be “overloyal” mothers to our daughters and sons (not to create needy daughters or mama’s boys though). So I guess we gotta learn to give up on people early in the game lol??” Her sarcasm, (which I love…it’s one of the reasons why we’re friends) rings very true. Where is the line? I know it may be fine, but can we see it? Would it be dumb to think that something we’re not doing in practice (being loyal/working in relationships) will happen in the game (marriage to divorce)?

Put it like this…I like the outcome of my hair styling sessions. I’m willing to put it the work when the outcome is what it is. BUT, if (God forbid) a fire catches my hair a la Michael Jackson…no amount of deep conditioner can help that. I’m going to have to cut this ish off.

What say you? How much work is too much?

Love,

–V

One of my favorite sayings from “The Game” character Tasha Mack is, “Emotional walls, girl…emotional walls!” It means that she’s in a situation where she needs to detach herself so she can do something without bias/say something smart/shank somebody/something. It probably (and by probably I mean “not at all” because she’s not a real person) came from a lifetime of having to sustain herself and her child in the hood and beyond. It was a learned behavior.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve had some time to reflect on myself and my own behaviors. Even a few months ago in this post, I wondered what I am giving off to attract the “type” of guys who become attracted to me. Now, for the first time in a looooooooooong time, I have started thinking about my past relationship. The one that ended over a year ago. Not about him (in the least), but about it. I’m trying to figure out my learned behaviors.

One thing I’ve observed from watching Sex and the City is that Carrie always took her cues from her relationship with Big. I’m pretty sure that her other relationships did not work because she was either acting like she was still with Big or behaving in the manner that would cause behavior she craved from Big. She kept things light. (He would withdraw if she went too deep.) She made insinuations until absolutely necessary. (He used directness as a way to highlight reluctance to commit, and she never wanted his mind to go there…and he knew it.) Laughing and banter is what cultivated their intimacy. (He would have been turned off by emotional outpours.) She learned the game and played it until she couldn’t. (I would normally reference a specific show here, but choose an episode with Big in it, and then pick an example. Don’t worry…the words will still be here when you get back ;). )

Anyone who has known me for at least 8 years knows about three different versions of who I am, and I’m willing to bet that they are all some variation of timid, subdued, and bold. Some people (who shall remain nameless) have referred to me as a nutcracker within the past year or so (how rude, lol). It wasn’t like this before. Oh, I’ve always been opinionated. Maybe a little less direct than I am now,  but I’ve never been afraid to express that opinion, but in relationships? I walked the line that was drawn. Tried to be ever-accommodating. I was vulnerable (not a bad thing necessarily) and though I was never overly emotional, I was not afraid to express my feelings.

My ex was very scaled back. He wasn’t overly affectionate. We had a highly intellectual relationship…our jokes about arguing over the correct pronunciation of Hungary during the Olympics at 4am, or the little Jamaican girl with the attitude on the Scripp’s Spelling Bee are some of my best memories of us because it was totally us. No one else would do it. Most of the time if we were together, people could only tell we were dating by the proximity of our seating, but they admired the yin and yang thing we had going. We held hands rarely, and usually in cases that dictated it – romantic dinners, walks on a beach, around other people who were holding hands. We danced together on New Year’s Eve at his uncle’s annual party. We sat opposite each other at dinner…never shared a bench like the people we sometimes made fun of (“Don’t they need elbow room?”) What’s funny is, I always wanted more (not a lot more because it would have been too much). He shut down if I “explained” too much and it seemed like it was emotional. He complained if I fell asleep on him while watching movies, because it would make it difficult for him to move around if he needed to do so.

So what did I do? I danced on New Year’s Eve. I sat on the opposite bench. I held hands quickly at traffic lights. I solidified my explanations to bare speaking points, infused with jokes so it never seemed too emotionally driven. I put my feet on him instead of my head. I allowed him to temper my emotional behavior because that relationship was my first “real” one. It cultivated “relationships” for me. In other words, I Carrie-d.

Now, I don’t understand real flirting with actual feelings involved. Oh I can play the game, but not when there’s anything to lose. It’s not in my natural reaction to be overly affectionate, even though I don’t dislike it at all. I shut down when I hear too much emotion in someone’s explanation to find the bare points. And I try as I’m learning. It comes out in spurts like cars with 9 tablespoons of gas. I’ll get very affectionate…and then go sit in my chair where it is impossible to sit next to me. I wonder if anyone else has this story.

I don’t think I want to stay this way, but I don’t want to Carrie either. What’s a girl to do?

Do you have any learned behaviors lingering from the past? Are they helpful? Harmful?

Love,

–V

Last night, two friends came over and we watched my admittedly favorite season of Sex and the City (Season 3). We started at the beginning with “Where There’s Smoke” and so many blog post options came about, but I decided to write about leftovers.

In this case, I am not talking about food. I’m talking about issues. I have talked at length about how slow I’m taking it, but I am now recognizing that one of the major reasons for my SlowPoke Rodriguez is the issues that were created as a result of my breakup. I have never had issues of this sort before, but now they are rearing their ugly heads. I find it difficult to believe anything without proof, and this has a lot to do with the lies of my ex. I think it’s only an issue because I chose to move past every lie I discovered, thinking that we were moving forward. That, my friends, was my fault in hindsight.

In this episode when Carrie met the politician, he offered to buy her a drink, which she declined until he gave a reason that didn’t seem threatening to her. He asked for her address, which she only gave after he explained that he would only use it for the official government purpose of telling her voting district. He asked for her number, which she chose not to give. He asked if it was a bad break-up, and was rewarded with a silence (and a half).

The entire theme of this episodes was being rescued as a princess; however, each woman fought it tooth and nail, or accepted the appearance when it didn’t add up. Miranda didn’t want Steve to help her get home after eye surgery. Charlotte allowed her “white knight’s” appearance to overcloud his reality. Samantha tried to create her own fantasy, and only ended up embarrassed.

This is what I wonder. It can’t be that easy to find the line between pulling back and going full throttle. If it was, everyone would understand relationships overnight. And even when you get past the surface of your pain, the undercurrents are harder to heal. Carrie put it best by saying, “I was so burned in my last relationship that I was terrified of leaping off into the next one.” Even when her guy showed an act of faith of showing up, she sat there fully dressed and refused to give in to his request. It took Miranda to put it into perspective. That realization gave her the courage to share with the politician that it was a bad breakup, and she needed to take things slowly. I recently had a conversation with a friend about this, and she said something very profound. She said, “Your fear is hand in and with some void that you have yet to discover. It is important to find it before you hurt him. He can’t pay for what he didn’t do. And you aren’t even doing anything to him, but your refusal to act can do even a little bit of damage that isn’t deserved.”

Good point.

You have to deal with your leftovers. As anyone can tell you, leftovers left too long are just a mess to clean up, but the sooner you do it, the better. Then maybe, like Miranda, I’ll be able to see him, or whoever, more clearly. Because obviously, “Where There’s Smoke…”…there IS fire.

I hope you all had wonderful weekends. I enjoyed our rainy weekend, and got much-needed rest.

Love,

–V

I hate* my friends.

Heart to Heart...

They consistently try to point out logic and truth when I don’t want to hear it. I was talking to one of my friends about my timidity of trusting someone and stepping out into relational waters again. She said, “Like, real talk? Not about him, or about your ex, because you haven’t said anything negative about him since the new year, but you have been throwing major shade at yourself. You are letting someone’s past actions dictate how you act, even if it is ‘in spite of.’ You are responding to him in defense of what you think he’ll do, and you need to remember that he is not your ex. You can’t treat him like he is, or like he will be. You have to let him be him, and take it how it goes. I’m not saying don’t be cautious, but don’t do this.”

*crickets* 😳

I gave the only response that I could give in that moment….

…”No, YOU stupid.”

We both cracked up. I acknowledged what she said, but thought about it on the car ride home. How much credit do we give our past in how we go about our present? I hate the idea that my past relationship can have that much power over the things I do right now. Who is really running these decisions that I make?

Another friend of mine called me a cold freezer today. He said I either have some hellified defense mechanisms, or I really don’t care. I believe it is the former. Only your friends can tell you those things about yourself that you don’t really want to hear. Or acknowledge. They can call into question your actions that you don’t want to analyze for yourself. They can make you view it so even if you decide to keep doing what you’re doing, you’re doing it consciously. Doesn’t that suck? Miranda did it for Charlotte in SATC 2: the movie. She forced her to admit that motherhood is not always nice, fun, or wanted. Only then could she really say what she wanted or needed, and stop running herself crazy or being resentful.

The ending of my last relationship blindsided me. In hindsight it should not have, but in the moment, it did. I keep wondering if I will walk into another head-on collision unprepared, so I’m checking every nook and cranny for possible signs. My friend said if I continue to do that, it in and of itself will cause the accident I was looking for. (She didn’t state it in this manner, but you know, implications and whatnot.) So I can admit this: I’m scared.

*sigh* 😕

Can’t you see why I hate* my friends? I just can’t right now. Goodnight 🙂

Love,

–V

* hate here means desperately thankful for even if I don’t admit it in the moment. This definition stops at the culmination of this post, and is only active within the confines of the post itself.

I know, I know. I’ve been gone.

I’ve been busy…like so busy that my house routinely looks like a hurricane hit it because I was coming in to fall asleep or shower and change clothes. Not all of it has been work. Some of it has been play. Or leisure. I have been multiplying friends like bunnies, and they are a great group of people! I’ve been home (twice) for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and truly enjoyed hanging out with my family. My cousin and I are planning the next trip (GERMANY BABY!), and my job is gearing back up.

I don’t have a New Year’s Resolution. I will only resolve to do the things I want to do, and refrain from doing the opposite.

I have had things to write about too! I have at least had 10 posts written in my head, but never got around to typing them up (and they were good).

Believe it or not, I haven’t watched Sex and the City since September! (That’s how busy I’ve been.) However, I remember something Carrie said, that though I’ll tweak it, still remains true.

“Breakups are tough. They’re hard…but I’d never have made it through without my friends.” –the same can apply to all years…to my friends that helped me make it through 2010, I’ll run through a downtown party in my pajamas and heels if you need me!

Happy New Year’s folks! 🙂

Love,

-V

Don’t judge me.

I hurt my neck this weekend.

I can’t prove it, but I’m pretty sure that I hurt it “Whippin’ my hair back and forth” with Willow Smith’s song. This was on Saturday evening; my upper back and neck just shut down on Sunday evening. I thought I had pinched a nerve or something! It wasn’t until a friend of mine said, “Hey, maybe it was from that whippin’ last night.” Eureka.

Throwback Carrie

Now, I’ve just turned 27, but I can clearly remember whole days of high school. It doesn’t seem like I should be heading for my ten year reunion (Reminder: pay for ten year class reunion). Even as I write this, my friend who I’m on the phone with said, “Ten years doesn’t seem like a long time. I would’ve thought in ten years I should’ve changed the world.” So, if my mind is still there…where the heck are my other muscles??

I had time to think while I was laying on my heating pad (again, don’t judge me), how many injuries have we endured getting older? Physical or otherwise? Yeah, I’m dealing with a neck injury, but my heart has gotten bashed in a time or two. If I can make it through the latter, the former should pass just as smoothly. Friends walked away in grade school, just like they walked away in college, and even once I moved to Georgia. It seems to be the cycle of life. I get nervous about things just like the first day of 9th grade and excited about things like Homecoming of my Senior Year.

My linesister Alisha even talked about how she used to be able to shut down the club with the best of them, but now anything longer than around 1am gets a “kill yo’self”. It doesn’t seem that long ago…but apparently our bones know differently.

Even Carrie had to inform Samantha in Season 5 that it was time for ladies her age to “cover it up” (Cover Girl). She also tried to refuse running around Times Square looking for a cute sailor to kiss, because “that ship has sailed…pun intended” (Anchors Away). So what things are age telling is no longer appropriate? Were they even appropriate then? I’m just saying, would I have been able to whip my hair all night long at 21, or is whipping just outta order because no good can come of it? (lol…that might’ve gotten too deep for what I’m trying to convey here.)

Summing it up, what are the injuries of getting older? Is it just the physical of bad knees from sports playing days, or is it more to it than that? I tell you what…no more Willow for me…that’s all I’m saying.

3 or 4 broken hearts, a failed marriage, pessimism, and cancer: Did they see it coming?

Love,

-V

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