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We’ve all been told honesty is the best policy. Recently, I have been involved in a situation where I wondered whether or not it would have been a good idea to just not say anything, which could be termed lying by omission.

In Season 3, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” Carrie is overcome with guilt about her affair with Big, and wants to tell Aidan. She even had this same issue with Sex and the City 2 in the opposite way, telling Big about kissing Aidan. Both times Samantha said to keep it to herself. Her reasoning was that Carrie did not really want to help the situation, she wanted to absolve herself of the guilt. This causes me to ask this question: is it selfish to tell someone something that could hurt their feelings simply because it may relieve you of your own?

I often wonder if that was the reason I never got a concrete answer as to the actual reason my relationship ended. My guess is that he had something that would ultimately hurt my feelings, and he did not want to say. Guess it wasn’t that much guilt about it. *shrug* Or maybe, he cared too much to hurt me. I’m deciding to go with the former though… Anyway, in the same vein, I also wonder if I come clean about things just because a person deserves to know, or because I want to alleviate myself of the guilt. I’m not quite sure, honestly…(no pun intended).

I’m curious to know what someone else might think. Tell it…keep it?

Love,

–V

Before I even get into this, I must say that I need to come up with some kind of plan to post consistently. There is a bit much going on at work, but I will work through it.

Now with that said, let’s get to it.

Samantha.

I’ll be the first to admit, I do not have a lot in common with Samantha. She is probably the complete opposite of who I am. Therefore, when trying to find items that I thought represented her, I was at a loss. I thought, “There is no way I’m posting pictures of my underwear.” After a lot more deliberation, I decided to come up with items that were most like Samantha is spirit, rather than literally. So these are my favorite things that I own (and paid for with my own money) – inspired by the character…So here we go:

My Favorite Things - Samantha Style

Let’s start with shoes…

I love these shoes…they both have something about them that makes me feel badass. The shoe on the left is a pair I ordered from ShoeDazzle.com, Kim Kardashian’s online shoe store (I am addicted to this site…it’s just not even funny anymore). The pair on the left is from Bakers. The platform and bright color on this one make me think Samantha. Seems like something she’d wear with a regular business suit. Both have something a little bold about them (at least bold for me), and when I wear them, I stand out. 🙂

Next up is the makeup. Three things, MAC’s Show Orchid Lipstick, Urban Decay’s Revolution Lipstick, and NYX’s American Queen Mega Shine Lipgloss are bold, even for me, and I am not afraid of color when it comes to makeup! Both Show Orchid and American Queen have that dialed up fuschia-pink going on. Whenever I wear it, I have gotten used to people staring at my mouth. I believe I chose Revolultion not only for the in your face red, but for the packaging as well. Urban Decay’s packaging features a dagger at the end of the lipgloss. If that’s not bold…

Samantha had pretty bold nails in Sex and the City 2 (or was I the only one that noticed that?), and even though I don’t go as crazy as she did, I do like a little pizazz on the nails from time to time. Chic Prints by Sephora by OPI allows ladies (or gents, whatever) to quickly apply a bold print with easy removal. I saw them online one day, and immediately went to Sephora. Whenever I wear them, people always ask “Is that Minx?” Only problem? I have small nail beds, so I have to do a lot of editing to get it to look right on my nails.

Pic from InStyle UK

The other polish is Nabi Nail Lacquer. I picked it up for $3 at MetroPark. I painted my nails with Zoya’s Trixie (silver), and then coated these little rhinstone pieces on top of it. It was my say goodbye to summer nail 😦

The glasses are by Betsey Johnson, and they have little gold speckles on the side with a pink heart. The ring is from…somewhere. Either New York and Company, or Rock ‘n Sole. I forget.

Anyway, these are my Samantha-iest things that don’t go folded up in a drawer. What brings out the Samantha in you?

Love,

–V

P.S. If you want to join ShoeDazzle, here is my invite link. You know I have a shoe issue, so help support my habit if you’d like. Every 3 friends to make a purchase, you get a free pair. Come on! My bday just passed, so technically you could be in on getting me a present 😉 I’m just saying…

"What the heck am I doing?"

You know when you meet someone who is just “alright”? Intelligent enough to not make you crack jokes on him in your head while trying not to roll your eyes in real life; attractive enough to be seen with him in a restaurant; interesting enough to keep you laughing; all the while you are not foreseeing anything resembling seriousness.

This does not, however, stop you fromt wanting to throw yourself at him on a random Tuesday for no apparent reason. It doesn’t even make sense to your own self. It happens to the best of us folks. I think I’ve figured it out possibly, maybe…well, not really. It’s because he has what we good old HBCU graduates call a “mouthpiece”. He knows how to string a few words together that sound good enough to be tempting, but not too much to get a “boy, please.” Whatever his thing is…aloofness, silliness, seriousness…he uses it just enough to pique your interest, and your mind does the rest.

Carrie Bradshaw had several of these. Vince Vaughn played an “agent” who turned out to be a personal assistant, but had just enough game to rope her in. So did the politician in Season 2…until he wanted to pee on her. Noticing a pattern. Generally, this guy may have some issue that his game covers up. So ladies, be afraid…be very afraid. Trust me…I know.

Love,

-V

Celebrate!

In approximately 17 minutes from the time I began writing this entry, it will be my 27th birthday. I have not been this excited for a birthday in a long time. I have plans with my girls, I have a dress that fits well after many days of eating grapefruit, and shoes. I am planning for it to be a great day.

What I love most about it is that I will be surrounded by people who have always had my back, and those who have shown me more recently that they don’t mind holding it down too. It’s funny, when someone who once said he’d love you “forever and a day” walks away without looking back, it forces you to truly appreciate those who show that they mean exactly what they say. And this is not to throw shade on him, honestly. I just truly have a new appreciation. I can now more clearly see the difference between associates and friends. My bs detector is up to date. And I love harder those who have proven themselves there for me…and I’m a bit more selective about who is in that group.

At the beginning of 2010, I would have never have dreamed that this was the state I’d find myself in by my birthday. This picture is vastly different than I would have imagined…and I’m okay with that. SO, to each and every person who did something in my life to teach me a lesson to help me improve me, for you, I am grateful. The friends in my corner, I love you so much. You are my SATC and lovejones wrapped in one. And yep, that includes the person who broke my heart, because the lessons that spawned from the experience are irreplaceable…especially once the tears stopped. Since that moment, I hit the ground running, and haven’t stopped yet. So yeah, I just might owe you one.

I officially go back to work tomorrow. This is mildly depressing for me, though I am thankful that I have a job.

So instead of bemoaning the loss of my summer and freedom, I’m going to recount the amazing things that happened this summer, because trust me I didn’t see them coming. I was just having a conversation with a friend that reminded me of how we both were concerned about my summer. The “free time” could have been heartwrenching so soon after a break-up. Now, I’m like, “Can I just have two more weeks???”

1. Making new friends. I made more acquaintances in the past two months or so than I have in the entire time I’ve lived in Georgia. I even strengthened an acquaintance to a full-fledged friendship. Trust me, girl, I wouldn’t have made it without you this year. This doesn’t take away from my existing friendships…it actually added to them.

2. Attempting things I was afraid of. Make-up artistry is a passion of mine, and this year I was really able to make it happen.

3. Shopping. I mean, this really didn’t change from before, but that doesn’t mean I enjoyed it any less.

4. Self-worth Reality. I got to see me for who I am as an individual, not who I am out of a couple. Let me tell you…I’ve probably gained a few points as an individual.

5. Making Mistakes. While I won’t go into detail, the mistakes I made this summer allowed me to understand my thought process, and the pain that doesn’t necessarily bother me daily is still there.

6. The cruise. Enough said.

7. Being more involved in activities. This was my busiest summer yet, and I loved every second of it. My wallet may not have, but I sure did.

8. Last but not least, strengthening and renewing my relationship with God. It’s like, when you know you’re in the wrong, you avert your eyes. There were a lot of things I was in the wrong for relationship-wise, and I knew it. I was trying to “wait it out” hoping that once it was righted, then I could pick back up with God where I left off. God basically gave me a “wheretheydothatat?” I know…I know.

So, those of you in jobs where you don’t really get summers off that sucks may not understand this, but before a new school year, I always reflect on the last. If this year has any of the improvements of the summer, I’m looking forward to it (figuratively…not actually. I just want to sleep in again tomorrow).

Love,

-V

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